You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize