Sober January is a disaster.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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