I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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