Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
The power of my boobs compel you
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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