We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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