You're earring is so big in my mouth
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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