i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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