Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Randomize