even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
he puts the penis in happiness.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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