Texts From Last Night

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  (417): View more from Missouri

  Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.

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  (417): Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls. http://tfl.nu/0cx7
  Replies (12) Good night (3228) Bad night (678)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room

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  (403): I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room http://tfl.nu/da0x
  Replies (156) Good night (5469) Bad night (701)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.

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  (201): It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar. http://tfl.nu/427l
  Replies (8) Good night (3342) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.

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  (619): I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person. http://tfl.nu/uqdv
  Replies (54) Good night (1727) Bad night (5795)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.

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  (501): Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog. http://tfl.nu/8mg1
  Replies (18) Good night (10241) Bad night (1881)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden

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  (513): he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden http://tfl.nu/xsqd
  Replies (14) Good night (5725) Bad night (1084)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.

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  (914): He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash. http://tfl.nu/xg6e
  Replies (9) Good night (3287) Bad night (778)
• Favorite

  (+49): View more from Germany

  he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit

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  (+49): he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit http://tfl.nu/mxfj
  Replies (16) Good night (3174) Bad night (1710)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...

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  (906): He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me... http://tfl.nu/pc0c
  Replies (21) Good night (2147) Bad night (3693)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke

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  (407): A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke http://tfl.nu/oufu
  Replies (4) Good night (604) Bad night (2137)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.

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  (505): Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening. http://tfl.nu/2dkx
  Replies (24) Good night (3492) Bad night (807)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.

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  (216): I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast. http://tfl.nu/0c0z
  Replies (4) Good night (2127) Bad night (519)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.

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  (307): The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity. http://tfl.nu/x8mh
  Replies (2) Good night (1175) Bad night (528)
• Favorite

  (682): View more from Texas

  She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.

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  (682): She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels. http://tfl.nu/oykt
  Replies (12) Good night (1039) Bad night (595)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.

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  (860): I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today. http://tfl.nu/vp47
  Replies (7) Good night (231) Bad night (704)

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