yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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