Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
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