She said her name was "party"
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
