You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Randomize
