just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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