Its about making memories worth repressing
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize