dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
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