that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
no, he came in my armpit
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
