But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
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he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
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The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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