Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I forget how to act sober
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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