My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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