how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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