It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
