I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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