how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize