And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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