Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
