So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
