So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
