There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
