I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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