Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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