i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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