Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
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