You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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