people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
