Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
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After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
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You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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