I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize