Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
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