Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
