If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Randomize