I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
