Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
