I need help removing her.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
