just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
