Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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