I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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