Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
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