drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Randomize