I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize